IN ORDER TO LET GO
I HAD NO IDEA HOW MUCH GRACE I NEEDED UNTIL THE MOURNING PERIOD HAD ENDED. I WAS LETTING GO OF AN OLDER VERSION OF MYSELF WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY RELEASING MULTIPLE ENERGIES FROM THE PAST. THESE ALLEGEDLY DEVOUT, YET POTENT PATTERNS, INCLUDED PEOPLE, THOUGHTS, HABITS, & SONGS,,, I HAD AN INITIAL DAY OF MOURNING ONCE I COMPLETED THE RELEASE ALOUD. I TURNED AWAY FROM THE WORLD AND CLIMBED INTO BED ALLOWING THE TEARS TO REPEATEDLY ROLL DOWN MY CHEEKS. THE SCREAMS I FORCED INTO THE PILLOW THAT CRADLED MY NECK, PRODUCED CRYPTIC SOUNDS I WAS UNAWARE LIVED INSIDE OF ME. IT HURT LIKE HELL TO KNOW THAT I HAD PAINS ATTACHED TO THIS VERSION OF MYSELF. EVEN MORE TO REALIZE I WAS JUST FINE WITH LETTING GO. I WAS SUFFOCATING WHILE EASILY BREATHING. AND THAT HAD TO STOP!! THE CHANGE JUST HAPPENED. AND INSTEAD OF IGNORING THE IMMINENT TOWER-PRETENDING I HAD IT ALL FIGURED OUT-I CHOSE TO PUSH MY LUCK ...
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