HEALING 101: IS IT ACTUALLY POSSIBLE? WHAT DOES IT TAKE?

"darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that; hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that." - dr. king

    i never knew there was a love like this before.  pardon me while i verbally quote faith evans, but try-with concentrated verve-to comprehend the validity of those lyrics.  imagine growing up in a household with no love; surviving on abuse, neglect and sarcasm as its stunt double.  i've never been able to describe the house i dwelled in, in my younger years, as home.  i never felt safe, supported or seen.  every "nice" occurrence, i.e. a birthday or holiday celebration was all an act for the audience we entertained.  there was no one around to help me draw the conclusion of unconditional love or the likelihood of healing generations of passed down wounds.  all that i'm able to understand and express today came to pass through tumultuous, but victorious trial and error.  the fear, the tears, the isolation and pain as i unearthed past traumatic experiences and relived haphazard patterns-all while dodging the spiritual bullets shot at me from hurtful, shameless entities-was enough to leave me destitute and enraged for years to come.  my saving grace was an unwavering dedication to refuse attachment to the toxicity that threatened to ruin my life and negate any possibility of attaining true happiness.  i understand what you're experiencing.  i am a true testament that healing is achievable!  so, since you're already here, let's go step-by-step & heal.  

step 1: we start this journey with introspection

you must choose to heal and purposefully strive to attain this desire 

REMEMBER TO GIVE YOURSELF GRACE & BE GENTLE WITH YOUR THOUGHTS & WORDS

- in this step we come to terms with what happened, why it happened, who was the main character in the trauma, how they felt about themselves and who we were-mentally, emotionally, physically and intellectually-at the time of each incident.  we raise our vibration here, and give the individuals involved a view from an alternate perspective.  as we revisit these circumstances, we do our best to assess each person's invisible pain and trauma.  we look at our internal selves and figure out what we must unearth-pull from under the rug-in order to address the root of our trauma(s).  what you discover, however, can encompass multiple instances of forgotten situations.  you may even uncover generational mysterious left unsolved.  take the time to unpack these isolated moments, one at a time.  give yourself space to contemplate each question and space to comprehend the mountain you will climb for each answer.  it may take days, weeks, even months in between, so do not overwhelm yourself with the task of healing all your wounds at once.  you will awaken an emotionally naked version of yourself as you jump each hurdle and this will require your undivided attention.  find a safe space where you can remember, cry, scream and express your frustrations openly.  unburdening yourself of the mental, emotional and physical hurt you've had to tirelessly carry will drain you and you'll want to release in a space that helps you feel balanced and in control. 

- grab a journal and write down the exact situation as you remember it and the domino effect this has had on your life up until this specific time.  

answer the questions below

1) how old were you?

2) were you able to defend yourself or were you defenseless?

3) as an adult, were you unaware of the decisions you made due to inner-child wounds?

4) how did this affect your relationship with self and others?

5) how do you handle conflict or difficult situations/challenges as a result?  

6) how do you receive compliments and/or praise for your accomplishments?  

7) did this affect your physical body, your mental health and/or your emotional stability at the time and does it still?

8) what would you have done/said differently? 

9) are you currently in contact with this/these individual(s)

10) do you harbor contemptuous feelings for them? if so, what are those feelings?

11) would it be wise to release them from your life?  

- then, you must list the qualities in yourself & the life circumstances that've stemmed from this wound that you'd like to see healthy, happy and whole.  

answer the questions below

1) how do you want to handle conflict?  

2) what types of relationships would you like to experience?

3) what qualities would you prefer to pass down to your children?  

4) are you willing to forgive yourself and the parties involved for your desired freedom?

5) in what ways can you show yourself more love and affection?  

step 2: we start this journey with dreams and goals

you must tap into creative pursuits & hobbies outside of your comfort zone.  

REMEMBER TO TRUST IN YOUR DESIRE TO CHANGE & YOUR ABILITY TO ADAPT 

- in this step, we give ourselves the opportunity to dream and to rediscover our hidden talents.  you will be releasing a past version of yourself in step one, so step two will open your eyes to the version of you you've always dreamed of.  

answer the questions below

1) what was it that you used to do-the gifts from GOD that made you giddy-that came to an abrupt halt as a result of the trauma?  

2) what are some activities you'd love to experience but have been unable to because they're too far out of your comfort zone?  

3) what do you need in order to experience the manifestation of your dreams?

4) what can you do right now that would release tension and stress?

- time to do just that.  you must move in that energy.  visualize yourself doing these new activities, jumping back into the art form that sets your soul free and the sensations of joy, happiness, fulfillment & love that'll stem from it.  speak your visions into existence.  i have all that i need to accomplish this dream.  i deserve to live in light.  now, be brave & act on it.  write a list and check off your accomplishments one at a time until you've crossed everything off.  type in business plan templates on google and get started on your own.  search eventbrite for gardening classes in your area and join.  look up local volunteer opportunities at an animal/homeless shelter and sign up.  travel.  even if it's the next city over.  start somewhere.  drop by that restaurant that has the cuisine you've been dying to taste.  shake off those nerves and learn a new language.  write down the recipe from the youtube channel you've been stalking and learn to make a new dish.  step into the local hair salon/barbershop and switch up your look.  whether it's salsa, hip-hop or tango, take that dance class.  buy the pots and seeds and all that you need in order to start that front yard, backyard and/or rooftop garden.  take that pottery class.  learn to play checkers with your online friends.  sit at the park and observe the locals in a chess &/or card game.  yes, to bungee jumping.  yes, to rock climbing.  color, paint, draw, read, write, create.  push yourself to enjoy this new you and these new creations.

step 3: we start this journey with hope and determination

you must decide to work on your health and wellness.

REMEMBER, IT'S PRACTICE THAT MAKES PERFECT.   TAKE YOUR TIME AND BE RESILIENT 

- in this step, we assess our current health and the desire we have for a healthier, more well-rounded version of self.  we overcome the way of the world and find out who we truly are.  

answer the questions below

1) would you like to care for your body, mind and soul?

2) do you exercise? - if so, how often? - if not, what is holding you back?

3) is your health suffering due to a lack of exercise?

3) do you feed your body the foods it deserves? i.e. fruits, vegetables, water, organic, rich in vitamins & minerals

4) is your health suffering due to the way you eat?

7) do you fast? - if so, how often? - if not, would you like to start?

8) how often do you sun/star/moon gaze? bird watch? stop and smell the roses? walk barefoot in the grass? 

- if you answered yes to question one, good for you.  that's a great start.  here are some tips to help you achieve that goal.  visualize yourself in this light.  what does a healthy you look like? how does this version of you feel?  are you confident in this glowing skin?  time to speak these truths into existence.  positive affirmations are a huge factor when speaking your truths.  try these on for a size: i am confident.  i am beautiful.  i am worthy of this new version of me.  i am deserving of a healthy and wealthy life.  now, you must act. 

 

mind: breathe and release to set your mind free 

-  choose one day/week to turn off your cell phone-most of the day, for a few hours or the whole day-and practice mindfulness.  this technique focuses on helping one to be present-experiencing thoughts, sensations & feelings without judging them.  in this energy, you're aware of all that is transpiring around you and mindfully living in the moment.  another way to ease and heal the mind is to listen to upbeat music & dance.  i have playlists according to the chakras i want to open, unblock and align and as i drown myself in lyrical waves, i dance like nobody's watching and sing with the gusto of a shower pop-star.  afterwards, i feel a type of freedom-a happiness overflowing in light-that's almost indescribable.  i must admit that keeping a tidy space also assists in healing the mind.  waking up and making my bed before i begin my day helps me feel orderly and prepared.  teaching others a skill you're really good at can also bring peace and accomplishment to the mind.  puzzles, reading and writing bring about the opportunity to aid in cognitive brain development.  so, if you're into crosswords & memory games alike, choose your fave, kick up your feet and dive in.  the best way to heal the mind for me, however, has been meditation.  right along with making my bed in the morning, i wake with a silent 20-30min meditation practice.  i sit in a cross-legged position or child's pose-which also helps stretch my morning back aches-focusing on relaxation, regulating my breathing, and allowing my mind to decompress.  before i rest, i channel that same energy into a 20-30 meditation, which helps me gently flow into a restful sleep. 

body: treat your body the way you want it to be treated

exercise: set goals for yourself & use resilience to tackle them

- if the gym is your preference, write down what you'd like to accomplish and research the proper exercise machines and exercises that'll assist you in obtaining that goal.  what's your ideal goal weight?  what's you ideal dress/pants size?  do you want to tone?  do you want to build muscle?  don't be too nervous or afraid to ask a trainer/gym personnel for help.  they may have excellent ideas to help you reach your targets.    

- if you're not the gym type, try daily walks.  this is how i prepared for my hike along the camino de santiago portugues.  i would walk after dinner for 20-30 mins each way and would increase the times daily, until i was walking for 90mins both ways-resting & stretching in between.  so, start where you're comfortable and then expand your horizons little-by-little.  don't overwhelm and remember to hydrate.  i love coconut water as a natural hydrator and energy booster.  ginseng and green tea are also beneficial to increase stamina. 

- during my healing journey, i began to practice yoga and because it has worked for my body so perfectly, i still practice at least 3x/wk.  as the years have passed, i've developed a sunrise & sunset routine while occasionally adding new asanas as my body requires.  if you'd like to begin your yoga journey, i would suggest looking up specific poses online-as i did-that seem easier to attempt, then taking a beginners class at the ymca or local wellness center.  and remember to practice at home.  this is how you develop muscle memory and how you become stronger and more confident in your abilities.  yoga helps to relieve tension and stress from the body.  it also aids in promoting patience, as most poses are held for at least 20-30 seconds in order to fully stretch the muscles & release strain.  but, please start where you are-hold for 5-10 seconds and then work your way to longer holds.  my yoga routines promote inner & outer healing and are designed to connect with, open, unblock and align my chakras while strengthening my body.   

- your body will need time to adjust to these new exercises, so self-care is essential.  make time to recuperate.  schedule a massage, book a mani/pedi, visit a chiropractor and try acupuncture or cupping.  my first experience with a chiropractor opened my entire body to its rightful alignment.  it was pure bliss.  cupping and acupuncture assist me with the chronic back & joint pain and muscle tension & stiffness i sustained from a pedestrian car accident.  and massage is the only procedure that successfully alleviates the discomfort from my shoulder stress.  heating pads are necessary to help with muscle soreness and ice packs are beneficial when reducing inflammation.  feel comfortable loving on yourself.    

food: eat consciously. what are you putting into your body and why? 

- i will always suggest a vegan diet for those willing to help heal the land as well as their own bodies.  veganism-a practice i maintain today-has worked miracles for my body.  sidenote: for any woman suffering with menstrual cramps, becoming vegan took away my pain & discomfort.  i honestly forget i'm cycling 99% of the time.  however, i am incredibly aware of the effort and desire required to live this lifestyle, so i will start where you are.  choosing to eat consciously is the next best thing.  do you currently have food related health concerns?  if so, maybe cut out foods that increase unhealthy risks and replace with foods that'll reduce and/or alleviate said risks.  this logic applies for health conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, osteoporosis, obesity, kidney diseases, high cholesterol and digestive disorders like celiac, heartburn, irritable bowel syndrome and constipation.  balance your plate.  if you're used to eating three meals/day, choose to add greens like kale, spinach, lettuce & asparagus to improve digestive health, support cardiovascular health, boost brain health, provide essential vitamins and reduce the risk of certain cancers.  zucchini is an excellent source of vitamin c and beta carotene.  it's also rich in potassium, dietary fiber, and antioxidant.  for individuals managing their blood sugar levels, zucchini is perfect due to its low glycemic index.  it's also low in calories and can aid in weight management.  eggplant, also rich in dietary fiber, contributes to heart health, reduces inflammation & promotes digestive health.  its bountiful vitamin & mineral content helps protect against cellular damage, while antioxidants, such as delphinidin, may help prevent cancer.  add seasonal fruits to your lunch or dinner plate to control blood sugar levels, maintain blood pressure, promote bone health, treat indigestion, support cardiovascular health, enhance the skin, promote hair growth and boost energy levels.  apples and berries for fiber and antioxidants.  citrus, like oranges and grapefruit for vitamin c.  bananas for potassium and carbs.  melons-my fave-like watermelon and cantaloupe for hydration and refreshment.  cherries are amazing for digestion.  avocados are rich in healthy fats and fiber, they help reduce inflammation, they're packed with beneficial vitamins and minerals and contain antioxidants that help improve cognitive function and support gut health. 

- *if you are eating meat, cheese and highly processed foods, chances are you have elevated levels of inflammation in your body.  chronic inflammation has been linked to the development of atherosclerosis, heart attacks, stroke, diabetes and autoimmune disease.  plant based diets are naturally anti-inflammatory, because they are high in fiber, antioxidants and phytonutrients and much lower in inflammatory triggers such as saturated fat and endotoxins.  people who adopt a no meat diet can dramatically lower their level of c-reactive protein, an indicator of inflammation in the body*. (forksoverknives.com)

soul:  know the voice of your higher power & your higher-self

- i mentioned positive affirmations earlier, but they really work to soothe & enrich your soul.  a morning ritual where you speak positively to yourself promotes internal optimism, setting you up for a day filled with joyful-sometimes euphoric-happenings.  you will be stepping into a purpose-filled life as you heal and not everyone will be happy to see you free yourself from the normalized hamster-wheel and embark upon the road less traveled.  be aware of the darkness trying to interrupt your progress and practice daily affirmations as a way to support and encourage yourself while you heal your lineage.  as you progress on your journey, you'll begin to realize the ways in which our souls are connected to the world around us.  you'll experience a new level of love, empathy and grace for animals, children, elderly persons, for the downtrodden, people with disabilities and for people/animals senselessly suffering.  you may find yourself standing up for those unable to do so for themselves.  becoming one with nature through activities like tree hugging, barefoot walking, sun, moon & star gazing, bee watching-a form of meditation-and gardening will really heighten your spiritual vibration.  you will instinctively tune into the oneness of all things, everything and everyone.  another spiritual practice for me was tapping into my psychic and mediumship abilities.  i had no idea i was gifted this generational treasure until i began my tarot divination practices.  i realized very quickly why this practice was treated as negative and looked down upon in my one-sided religious upbringing.  tapping into tarot aided in the development of my understanding and recognizing ancestral, archangel, guardian angel and ascended master communication.  we can connect to the spiritual realm at any time.  i was able to experience the abundance of GOD for myself-dismissing old ways of thinking-and challenging myself to trust in new discernments.  my last tidbit of soul healing is fasting.  although, this practice challenges the mind and alleviates toxins from the body, it is the most efficient at expanding the soul's reach.  whether it's intermittent or days at a time, fasting allows you to open up to a perspective focused, not on going without, but on going within.  there's an inner-strength that derives from its implementation, allowing you to talk the talk and walk the walk of a divine being reaping the benefits of healing. 

        

i love you

i am you

you got this

you are not alone

thank you for reading. thank you for giving yourself grace as you embark upon this spiritual awakening.  thank you for giving yourself the opportunity to live a life filled with endless possibilities.  to heal; to release the past in a harmonious way, is a gift and a true testament to your unwillingness to settle for anything less than what you deserve.  you are so strong.  please continue, with all your might, to push into your north star.  healing will not happen overnight.  give yourself time to process each step and know that full alignment is attainable if, and only if, you persevere.  the memories will test your desire to truly see yourself in a higher light.  no matter what, please see yourself in this light and keep going! 

be patient  

be kind  

be mindful

be positive

be brave 

be you!

email me with any questions you may have or ones that derive from your journey.  and please don't hesitate to speak with a therapist if this becomes too intense for you to process on your own.  its always wise to speak to someone who can help. 

xo

jazz

source(s):

*https://www.forksoverknives.com/wellness/7-things-that-happen-when-you-stop-eating-meat/